Delicious salads; shaved squash, quinoa, goat cheese, figs, cantaloupe, flax seeds over a bed of baby spinach. I made the dressing by putting herbs, oils, and cantaloupes in food processor. A bit messy.
|Absolute love bliss|
The minute I saw him I was filled with a peaceful calm, a safe and secure feeling of being home. We dove head first into the weekend and had such a great time. The outpouring of genuine love and affection I have for this man is overwhelming.
When we went our separate ways about three years ago I was in a very unstable place. I doubted our relationship, stemming from doubting myself (which is expected from being 23 years old). I couldn't shake this feeling that I would resent our relationship because of the different levels of life experience from our age difference (about 20 years), and got it stuck in my head that I was supposed to be with someone my own age.
I've spent the last three years in extreme up's and down's, working on figuring out what makes me happy, by myself, but also searching for love in all sorts of places. I think this experience was necessary, albeit painful. I still have a long way to go. I feel like a have received an amazing gift from the universe; feeling and experiencing the exchange of love we have for each other in these past few days made me realize that the love I have been searching for was there all along, being patient (I hope) and kind and supportive.
I am not going to take this gift for granted or overlook the significance of our relationship. A week later, I do feel like I'm in the downswing of a drug binge (love drug). Jonathan went on to Panama, where he is starting an amazing job in a beautiful environment that has some amazing potential. I need to stay focused with the progress and drive my own life is taking, if not for the sake of honing a career for myself for future security, but also to become the best, healthiest, and most stable person I can be for the sake of our future relationship.
It is obviously very easy for me to fall into a depression right now, focusing on the negatives and tribulations, obsessing and wrapping myself in day dreams. I feel it trying to creep up on me. And that's why I need to make that much more of an effort to stay focuses and really do the healthy things I know will keep my life moving forward. And make it so that Jonathan and I can be together again. I think that's a pretty nice goal.
Okay, on to less serious things.
|Back patio at Dominique's|
Because I worked in service industry, I am very critical of service (I don't meant to be, I just notice things now). I took Jonathan across the street to La Petite Grocery for dessert. I've had one of the best meals in my life here, and the service is impeccable. We had the butterscotch pudding by suggestion and I will definitely be coming back just for that. It was also nice to be able to order a non-alcoholic cocktail of the bartender's choice and not receive orange juice and Grenadian. Thank you, La Petite Grocery bartender, for being fabulous.
|Seasoning my mortar and pestle|
|Espresso treat from Sucre|
|Reyn Yoga Studio|
Goals for the immediate future: Get my drivers license, drink more water, take some cooking classes (specifically ones that involve fish catching and preparation), do more yoga, and meditate! Let's do this!